Friday, June 26, 2009

Open letter to the bufoonish circle running my beloved Warriors

Dear Don Nelson & Minions,

I am writing this letter to you in good spirits!

Despite our disappointing 2008-2009 season, I have not lost hope in our ability to improve and be successful in the near future.

As you may know already, I was an outspoken proponent of Chris Mullin being renewed as the team's GM, and was not very happy about the way he was locked out, much like George Costanza was when he faked being handicapped at that playground equipment company.

Despite this, I recognize that you, Nellie, and your trio of hunchbacked, shadowy executives and quasi-executives, are trying to make a big splash this offseason.

I was a little surprised when you took Stephen Curry yesterday with the 7th pick. I was all but convinced that Jordan Hill, the long athletic power forward from Arizona would be a great fit to play alongside Biedie and Anthony Randolph.

Not to say Curry is not a superb talent, but I just wonder how he fits in with Monta Ellis in the long term.

We fans know that Monta is not exactly content right now, and he seems to be buying into this point guard nonsense that you've been shoveling down our throats, Nellie. However, you and I both know that Monta is better running off picks and shooting midrange jumpers or creating quick shots and short drives off picks at the elbow. His ballhandling skills and decision making in the halfcourt game will never be his strong suits, and everyone in America knows it.

Despite this, and the failed Jamal Crawford experiment last year, we still have the same issues heading into next season.

Curry is not a true point guard either, and is the same size as Moped Monta. Just like the Crawford-Ellis tandem of last year, this will create more defensive liabilities in the backcourt when playing against bigger guards. You can only defend one guy with Stephen Jackson, you know.

This curious selection of Curry only gets stranger when paired with the seemingly far-fetched tradewinds blowing in from the desert involving Amare Stoudemire.

A combination of Biedrins, Wright, Belinelli, Azubuike, and/or Curry would be sent to Phoenix for Stoudemire.

Nellie, I know you're salivating over Amare (or Amar'e as he decided at some point), but please, I'm begging you: DO NOT MAKE THE TRADE.

He is the big splash the Dubs covet. We all long to be relevant again, like we were when we had Baron Davis. This is the wrong move though.

Stoudemire is the worst defensive power forward in the league. I have personally watched this 6'10, 260 man stand in the key with his hands at his sides for nearly entire games. His blocked shot stats are nothing but a fraud. He is a terrible on ball defender and the majority of his blocks come from the weak side, where he comes in when he feels like it to swat balls into the stands. If he made half this effort when his man had the ball, he'd be a much better asset.

In addition, Amare Stoudemire is a moody guy who hates playing center. He never wanted to be a center, and he never will. Biedrins is a legit 5 and loves playing defense and protecting the key. He's also 3 years younger than Amare and is only getting better.

Furthermore Nellie, Amare is not a real 26, he's more like 30 or 31. Despite his tremendous athleticism and physique, he is a man in decline.

Before you freak out, there is real logic behind this.

He has already had the dreaded microfracture surgery on his knee, which really takes a few years and some explosiveness out of you in the long term (See Martin, Kenyon and McGrady, Tracy). In addition, he missed the last 2 months of last year with a severe eye injury. Who knows what kind of long term psychological damage that has on him. Perhaps he will dog it on defense even more when he sees arms flailing around near his eyes.

Amare has what we call Miley Cyrus syndrome.

Miley is only 16, but America didn't bat an eye when we found out she was dating a 20 year old man in public. That's not even legal in West Virginia. It was accepted because she's been in show business since she was like 12. She's probably more like 20 in terms of maturity because of her exposure to the craziness of "the life" for all these years.

Define statutory... --->

Since he's got Miley Cyrus syndrome, add 4 years onto Amare. He's 30.

Then of course there's the matter of Amare's contract. He can opt out of his deal after this season. Not even the Clippers would trade for Stoudemire unless that deal was extended, to the tune of $95 million over 5 years, re-retarding the Dubs' cap situation until 2015.

In short Nellie and Minions, Amare is not the right direction. I know he's tempting, but he will only set us back. Believe it or not, there's a reason why the Suns couldn't win with Nash, Amare, and the rest of them.

No team can beat the Lakers trying to run circles around them. I hate to say it, but they're the model roster you want, not the Suns circa 2006 sans a real point guard.

And if Monta is mad that you took Stephen Curry, send him and a lottery protected #1 pick to Minnesota for Ricky Rubio and a bad contract.

Rubio and Curry. Now that's a backcourt.


Daniel Pera
Loyal Warriors Fan

PS: Really guys, we couldn't get into the second round to steal DaJuan Blair? Does Paul Millsap ring a bell? Jesus, what a blunder.

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