The World of Sports...
Hey Folks,
Glad everyone is reading. Maybe it's because I've been bombarding people with links and plugs. True. Unfortunately there is no other way to get people to read it. So just read it on a regular basis, so I won't have to keep sending links all over creation. Now that's out of the way. Let's talk sports.
For starters, fuck the Yankees! I can't stand their fans, I don't like that dirty ass, crime ridden city, I don't like their stupid cabs, I don't like how much it costs to park, I don't like their accent, I don't like their owner, I don't like how they buy players.
Well, I think most people feel the way I do. The Yankees began buying players in the mid 90s, as George Steinbrenner started going crazy, and turning into a dictator. Well a few hundred million dollars later, they are an old roster with a 200 million dollar payroll, sittin' pretty in 4th place in the AL East with a 16-19 record. Yes. The Toronto Blue Jays and their 45 million dollar payroll are 19-16. There's nothing better than to see these obnoxious people and their "bought-and-paid-for" team floundering near the basement of a division that includes the AA level Tampa Bay Devil Rays.
Randy Johnson is over 40, Gary Sheffield is 37, Tino Martinez is 39, Posada is tired, the bullpen has seen better days, Bernie Williams is a geriatric, Jason Giambi is well... not Jason Giambi. The poor guy was thrown into the fire over the offseason when Grand Jury testimony was leaked in the BALCO case. Well whatever. The guy had a great swing. He should at least be able to hit the ball now. And by the way... Grand Juries are NOT SUPPOSED TO LEAK ANYTHING! THATS THEIR PURPOSE! A SECRET SET OF HEARINGS TO DETERMINE WHETHER SOMEONE SHOULD BE INDICTED AND BE PUT ON TRIAL! Anyway, there's been a lot of that going on, and it's bullshit. But anyway, Giambi is still owed 80 million for that absurd contract they signed him to a few years back, and he's hitting under .200. He's on the verge of being sent down to AAA ball. When was the last time that happened to an MVP? Even Ken Caminiti & Jose Canseco who were as 'roided out an MVP as can be could hit decently afterwards. The guy has lost his swing, lost his confidence, and it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. It's a bloody shame. Jason, you shoulda stayed in Oakland. They'd love you unconditionally, and you wouldn't have lost your stroke.
Bottom line. You need to spend money to win. Even the Florida Marlins of 2003 signed Ivan Rodriguez to a 10 million dollar contract out of the blue. On the other hand, the Yankees are outspending Boston by nearly 80 million dollars, and have hit absolute rock bottom. Yet there are grumblings about Roger Clemens back in pinstripes this summer? That's over 15 million bones for a guy who will most likely retire after this year. Their farm system is bankrupt of talent, and their roster is by far the oldest in baseball. Oh,and you owe A-Rod 25 million a year. Steinbrenner thinks you can improve a team just by buying players coming off good years, and proven (aka: really old) veterans. Hey George, why don't you donate some money to the local school system or open up your own scouting league in the Dominican Republic, that would be a lot better a use for your money. Nice gameplan George. I hope they finish last. Go Boston. Go Baltimore. Go Toronto. Go Tampa.
Suprises for 2005 so far:
Chicago White Sox: Balling out of control even after trading Carlos Lee, letting Magglio Ordonez go and having Frank Thomas on the DL. 25-9 record, by far the best in baseball. The starting rotation has been bulletproof so far. A pair of Cubans (El Duque & Contreras), undefeated Jon Garland, Freddie Garcia, and horse Mark Buerhle make up the staff. They're getting great innings out of Pollitte and Hermanson out of the bullpen as well. Keep it going South Side.
Milwaukee Brewers: Ned Yost is leading the much improved Brew Crew to a 17-16 record so far, good for 2nd place in the underachieving NL Central. The Beermakers are playing good baseball, getting huge contributions from Brady Clark, Lyle Overbay, and Carlos Lee, as well as southpaw Doug Davis, and the efficient Victor Santos. Also, how good is that Danny Kolb trade looking now? Kolb is floundering in the 404 with a 6.00+ ERA and the Brewers have found a solid stopper with the wild-haired Derrick Turnbow. By the way, I predicted that the Brewers were going to finish 3rd in that division. They're already in second even without awesome ace Ben Sheets.
Bay Area Blues: Giants & A's playing terribly. There are different problems for each team. The Giants have terrible injury problems and their bullpen is among the worst in the league. The A's have one of the worst offenses I've ever seen and "Franchise Player" Eric Chavez is hitting a buck 98. Hey Billy, maybe you should have paid that other guy, yeah, um... I think his name is Tejada or something.
Switching gears, let's talk a little NBA Playoffs. The 1st round had 2 good series: Bulls-Wizards and Rockets-Mavericks. Well it's looking like there is only 1 good series left. Sonics-Spurs might be lengthened a little if Jesus Shuttlesworth (Ray Allen) goes off like he did last series. However, the Dallas-Phoenix series is looking like the one that could be not only the most entertaining, but the longest.
The Suns are unstoppable, they will score. Their run and gun style of play, and the absolute domination by Amare Stoudamire in the paint, will be the reason they win the series. However they need Quentin Richardson to return to the mid season form he was in, and start draining more perimeter shots. Contributions from Jimmy Jackson off the bench will help. For Dallas, there are many keys. Dirk Nowitzki needs to perform at a very high level, including vocal leadership. He needs to get to the line, and he needs to take good shots; not so many turnarounds and fadeaways. Michael Finley was the reason the Mavs won game 2. He was shooting the lights out. The second reason they won was Erick Dampier. The man was chewed out publicly by Dirk, and the man responded. He will never be able to keep up with Amare the Beast down low, but he can get rebounds, put his huge body on someone, and put back some misses. He chalked himself up a double double, and with Finley, helped win the game. I am impressed with the performance and court leadership of Jason Terry ast well. Bottom line, this series may go 6 games, but Phoenix is just too hot. Nash is the MVP, and is too good to lose. They also need to make sure Joe Johnson is healthy. Game 2 was damn fun to watch, I hope to see more.
Indy won game 2, but Detroit is far too good to lose. Indiana doesn't have any favorable matchups offensively, and are not deep enough to compete with the tough D of the Pistons. Reggie Miller needs to be a beast in each game to compete and Jermaine O'Neal needs to stay out of foul trouble and perform at the level he is capable of. He is a beast, but needs help. Rip Hamilton is one of the best on ball defenders in the league and has the sweetest mid range jumper of anyone. I only wish he didn't wear that stupid ass mask still. The Wallace Brothers down low are too much to contend with for 48 minutes for Jeff Foster and O'Neal, and Tayshaun Prince is like some sort of mantis with long arms and a jump shot. Indy really coulda used Ron Artest right about now...
Washington has no chance to beat The Diesel & D-Wade, even with Arenas, Hughes, and Jamison playing at full blast. Therefore, analysis is not necessary. It will be a sweep.
Well, fresh off his awesome Superbowl performance, Terrell Owens can't wait to get back to minicamp and get together with his teammates to improve. Fat chance. "Terrible" Owens is back at it again. After missing the deadline to file paperwork to become a free agent with the Niners, he forced a trade. He was traded to Baltimore, and refused to report. Then he finally got his wish! He was traded to Philly for precisely JACK SHIT. Well this is when he signed a longterm, 49 million dollar contract. He was with his dream QB, Donovan McNabb, he didn't have to deal with a classy city anymore with behaviorally demanding fans, he had more money, what's not to like? Well a Superbowl loss later, he decided that the contract he signed wasn't good enough. So, he fired his deadline-missing agent, David Joseph, and hired super-asshole errrrr... super-agent Drew Rosenhaus. Now he claims that this contract is no good, and he is demanding another one, or else he's holding out. Because, "He's not the one who got tired in the Superbowl," he said, taking a shot at the classy team leader McNabb. Well T.O. have fun not playing the game you love. Owner Jeffrey Lurie said it's not an issue. Andy Reid doesn't want cancers around (anyone seen Freddie Mitchell?). Donovan McNabb doesn't want to go to battle with someone who doesn't want to be there. You know what? Fuck him. The hell with it. I don't care if he is the best receiver in the NFL. I don't care if he changes the game unlike anyone else. He signed a contract. He wanted to be there. That is a team. Brian Dawkins, Hugh Douglas, Jeremiah Trotter, Donovan McNabb, Jon Runyan, and the rest of classy hardworking players on that team don't want him if he's going to be like this. There is no Terrell in TEAM. Happy trails asshole.
It was recently announced that there will be a World Cup style baseball tourament in 2006. This is incredible. If all the stars play, it could be FUCKING AMAZING! There will be 16 teams, most notably, the US, Dominican Republic, Puerto Rico, Japan, Canada, Venezuela, and Japan. Imagine a stadium full of a multi-national crowd, waving flags, dancing around, getting shitfaced, and having a great time watching incredible All-Star teams compete for their flag. I won't go into it here, since ESPN already did it. I encourage you to check it out.
News Story:
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=2057633
What could happen:
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=schoenfield/050511
In case anyone cares, right now, the NHL playoffs would be in full effect. This was about the time last year that I was at my granparents house in rural Wisconsin watching the Sharks take on the Flames with a 12 pack of Hamm's. I was so into it. I went to the Sharks-Kings game for my birthday present last year. It's a great game, and it's a damn shame to see it gone. Instead of 20,000 crazy fans waving towels, the arenas are dark and quiet.
Ok then, good stuff. Good luck on finals to everyone that's takin' em right now. If you already took them, hope you did well. Keep reading. Until next time, keep it sleazy.
Glad everyone is reading. Maybe it's because I've been bombarding people with links and plugs. True. Unfortunately there is no other way to get people to read it. So just read it on a regular basis, so I won't have to keep sending links all over creation. Now that's out of the way. Let's talk sports.
For starters, fuck the Yankees! I can't stand their fans, I don't like that dirty ass, crime ridden city, I don't like their stupid cabs, I don't like how much it costs to park, I don't like their accent, I don't like their owner, I don't like how they buy players.
Well, I think most people feel the way I do. The Yankees began buying players in the mid 90s, as George Steinbrenner started going crazy, and turning into a dictator. Well a few hundred million dollars later, they are an old roster with a 200 million dollar payroll, sittin' pretty in 4th place in the AL East with a 16-19 record. Yes. The Toronto Blue Jays and their 45 million dollar payroll are 19-16. There's nothing better than to see these obnoxious people and their "bought-and-paid-for" team floundering near the basement of a division that includes the AA level Tampa Bay Devil Rays.
Randy Johnson is over 40, Gary Sheffield is 37, Tino Martinez is 39, Posada is tired, the bullpen has seen better days, Bernie Williams is a geriatric, Jason Giambi is well... not Jason Giambi. The poor guy was thrown into the fire over the offseason when Grand Jury testimony was leaked in the BALCO case. Well whatever. The guy had a great swing. He should at least be able to hit the ball now. And by the way... Grand Juries are NOT SUPPOSED TO LEAK ANYTHING! THATS THEIR PURPOSE! A SECRET SET OF HEARINGS TO DETERMINE WHETHER SOMEONE SHOULD BE INDICTED AND BE PUT ON TRIAL! Anyway, there's been a lot of that going on, and it's bullshit. But anyway, Giambi is still owed 80 million for that absurd contract they signed him to a few years back, and he's hitting under .200. He's on the verge of being sent down to AAA ball. When was the last time that happened to an MVP? Even Ken Caminiti & Jose Canseco who were as 'roided out an MVP as can be could hit decently afterwards. The guy has lost his swing, lost his confidence, and it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. It's a bloody shame. Jason, you shoulda stayed in Oakland. They'd love you unconditionally, and you wouldn't have lost your stroke.
Bottom line. You need to spend money to win. Even the Florida Marlins of 2003 signed Ivan Rodriguez to a 10 million dollar contract out of the blue. On the other hand, the Yankees are outspending Boston by nearly 80 million dollars, and have hit absolute rock bottom. Yet there are grumblings about Roger Clemens back in pinstripes this summer? That's over 15 million bones for a guy who will most likely retire after this year. Their farm system is bankrupt of talent, and their roster is by far the oldest in baseball. Oh,and you owe A-Rod 25 million a year. Steinbrenner thinks you can improve a team just by buying players coming off good years, and proven (aka: really old) veterans. Hey George, why don't you donate some money to the local school system or open up your own scouting league in the Dominican Republic, that would be a lot better a use for your money. Nice gameplan George. I hope they finish last. Go Boston. Go Baltimore. Go Toronto. Go Tampa.
Suprises for 2005 so far:
Chicago White Sox: Balling out of control even after trading Carlos Lee, letting Magglio Ordonez go and having Frank Thomas on the DL. 25-9 record, by far the best in baseball. The starting rotation has been bulletproof so far. A pair of Cubans (El Duque & Contreras), undefeated Jon Garland, Freddie Garcia, and horse Mark Buerhle make up the staff. They're getting great innings out of Pollitte and Hermanson out of the bullpen as well. Keep it going South Side.
Milwaukee Brewers: Ned Yost is leading the much improved Brew Crew to a 17-16 record so far, good for 2nd place in the underachieving NL Central. The Beermakers are playing good baseball, getting huge contributions from Brady Clark, Lyle Overbay, and Carlos Lee, as well as southpaw Doug Davis, and the efficient Victor Santos. Also, how good is that Danny Kolb trade looking now? Kolb is floundering in the 404 with a 6.00+ ERA and the Brewers have found a solid stopper with the wild-haired Derrick Turnbow. By the way, I predicted that the Brewers were going to finish 3rd in that division. They're already in second even without awesome ace Ben Sheets.
Bay Area Blues: Giants & A's playing terribly. There are different problems for each team. The Giants have terrible injury problems and their bullpen is among the worst in the league. The A's have one of the worst offenses I've ever seen and "Franchise Player" Eric Chavez is hitting a buck 98. Hey Billy, maybe you should have paid that other guy, yeah, um... I think his name is Tejada or something.
Switching gears, let's talk a little NBA Playoffs. The 1st round had 2 good series: Bulls-Wizards and Rockets-Mavericks. Well it's looking like there is only 1 good series left. Sonics-Spurs might be lengthened a little if Jesus Shuttlesworth (Ray Allen) goes off like he did last series. However, the Dallas-Phoenix series is looking like the one that could be not only the most entertaining, but the longest.
The Suns are unstoppable, they will score. Their run and gun style of play, and the absolute domination by Amare Stoudamire in the paint, will be the reason they win the series. However they need Quentin Richardson to return to the mid season form he was in, and start draining more perimeter shots. Contributions from Jimmy Jackson off the bench will help. For Dallas, there are many keys. Dirk Nowitzki needs to perform at a very high level, including vocal leadership. He needs to get to the line, and he needs to take good shots; not so many turnarounds and fadeaways. Michael Finley was the reason the Mavs won game 2. He was shooting the lights out. The second reason they won was Erick Dampier. The man was chewed out publicly by Dirk, and the man responded. He will never be able to keep up with Amare the Beast down low, but he can get rebounds, put his huge body on someone, and put back some misses. He chalked himself up a double double, and with Finley, helped win the game. I am impressed with the performance and court leadership of Jason Terry ast well. Bottom line, this series may go 6 games, but Phoenix is just too hot. Nash is the MVP, and is too good to lose. They also need to make sure Joe Johnson is healthy. Game 2 was damn fun to watch, I hope to see more.
Indy won game 2, but Detroit is far too good to lose. Indiana doesn't have any favorable matchups offensively, and are not deep enough to compete with the tough D of the Pistons. Reggie Miller needs to be a beast in each game to compete and Jermaine O'Neal needs to stay out of foul trouble and perform at the level he is capable of. He is a beast, but needs help. Rip Hamilton is one of the best on ball defenders in the league and has the sweetest mid range jumper of anyone. I only wish he didn't wear that stupid ass mask still. The Wallace Brothers down low are too much to contend with for 48 minutes for Jeff Foster and O'Neal, and Tayshaun Prince is like some sort of mantis with long arms and a jump shot. Indy really coulda used Ron Artest right about now...
Washington has no chance to beat The Diesel & D-Wade, even with Arenas, Hughes, and Jamison playing at full blast. Therefore, analysis is not necessary. It will be a sweep.
Well, fresh off his awesome Superbowl performance, Terrell Owens can't wait to get back to minicamp and get together with his teammates to improve. Fat chance. "Terrible" Owens is back at it again. After missing the deadline to file paperwork to become a free agent with the Niners, he forced a trade. He was traded to Baltimore, and refused to report. Then he finally got his wish! He was traded to Philly for precisely JACK SHIT. Well this is when he signed a longterm, 49 million dollar contract. He was with his dream QB, Donovan McNabb, he didn't have to deal with a classy city anymore with behaviorally demanding fans, he had more money, what's not to like? Well a Superbowl loss later, he decided that the contract he signed wasn't good enough. So, he fired his deadline-missing agent, David Joseph, and hired super-asshole errrrr... super-agent Drew Rosenhaus. Now he claims that this contract is no good, and he is demanding another one, or else he's holding out. Because, "He's not the one who got tired in the Superbowl," he said, taking a shot at the classy team leader McNabb. Well T.O. have fun not playing the game you love. Owner Jeffrey Lurie said it's not an issue. Andy Reid doesn't want cancers around (anyone seen Freddie Mitchell?). Donovan McNabb doesn't want to go to battle with someone who doesn't want to be there. You know what? Fuck him. The hell with it. I don't care if he is the best receiver in the NFL. I don't care if he changes the game unlike anyone else. He signed a contract. He wanted to be there. That is a team. Brian Dawkins, Hugh Douglas, Jeremiah Trotter, Donovan McNabb, Jon Runyan, and the rest of classy hardworking players on that team don't want him if he's going to be like this. There is no Terrell in TEAM. Happy trails asshole.
It was recently announced that there will be a World Cup style baseball tourament in 2006. This is incredible. If all the stars play, it could be FUCKING AMAZING! There will be 16 teams, most notably, the US, Dominican Republic, Puerto Rico, Japan, Canada, Venezuela, and Japan. Imagine a stadium full of a multi-national crowd, waving flags, dancing around, getting shitfaced, and having a great time watching incredible All-Star teams compete for their flag. I won't go into it here, since ESPN already did it. I encourage you to check it out.
News Story:
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=2057633
What could happen:
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=schoenfield/050511
In case anyone cares, right now, the NHL playoffs would be in full effect. This was about the time last year that I was at my granparents house in rural Wisconsin watching the Sharks take on the Flames with a 12 pack of Hamm's. I was so into it. I went to the Sharks-Kings game for my birthday present last year. It's a great game, and it's a damn shame to see it gone. Instead of 20,000 crazy fans waving towels, the arenas are dark and quiet.
Ok then, good stuff. Good luck on finals to everyone that's takin' em right now. If you already took them, hope you did well. Keep reading. Until next time, keep it sleazy.
posted by DP at 11:59 PM
1 Comments:
fuck you, the yankees rule the world. who has the most world series titles? it not my fault im raking in the dough. you would do the same if you had as much money as me.
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